One of the laments I often hear from Facebook friends and followers is their stance towards moving forward in life or "adulting" as some jokingly call it. It's a term and state of life that seems to draw battle lines as both sides scramble to defend their own position on why growing up, or not growing up is completely justified.
I see pictures of friends from high school and college, now starting families of their own. Pictures of newly married couples making trips to IKEA along with baby picture after baby picture of their little one growing older. They are adults, the things that only a few years ago seemed so far away for us and most likely them as well.
On the other end of the spectrum, we see people who are still living the single life. Posting pictures of going out at night, posting memes of "Why I'm Single" and bragging about all of the free time they have by not rushing into marriage or starting a family.
The interesting thing about these two sides is their almost frantic justifications on why they are in their respective situations without any provocation. You never see anyone start a fight over someone who has chosen to start a family nor do you ever see a newly wed couple bring themselves to negatively comment on someone still staying up late and having fun. People have lives and for the most part, leave each other to live their own as they see fit.
Despite this seemingly peaceful situation, the near constant posts, tweets and photos justifying each side is staggering. It seems that we feel the need to justify our reasons for living the way we do, posting our stances and beliefs as a way to appease some invisible judge ready to dish out judgment at any moment.
"I have my freedom and piece of mind! I'm glad I haven't made the jump towards the married life."
"I feel proud that I am able to handle my responsibilities! I'm glad that I can support a spouse and family."
Who's right in this situation? Is this a sign that our generation needs to accept the responsibilities of adulthood and grow up already? Perhaps it's a sign that we are abandoning our youth too quickly, leaving behind out times of growth and freedom to embrace something we're not quite ready for yet.
Everyone is right, and everyone is wrong.
In an age where we have the platform and ability to broadcast our opinions and voice to the world, we use the tools put in front of us tell our story and from the simple act of retweeting your favorite celebrity to posting a funny photo on Facebook, you story is being told and archived one post and one click at a time.
It's human nature to justify our choices, especially our larger potentially life changing ones we make. We're naturally very cautious and skittish as a species, wanting to have insurance and security in the things that we do. The world is changing and moving faster as the days pass, it's easy to get lost in the minutia, feeling like you are being stringed along rather than following a safe path.
While some post posts may seem annoying and defensive, it's something that has never really bothered me, but rather was seen as more of a reflection of who we are. No matter our place in life, no matter our situation we want to do well, we want to succeed and ultimately want to see others we care about succeeding. We want someone to laugh at our jokes and to an extent, our social media posts. We want to be told and acknowledged that what we are doing is ok, that bad situations will become better and good situations were the result of our best efforts.
The next time you see a post about not accepting those responsibilities you think they should have, or laughing at those who have rushed their life leaving behind their youth and happier times, don't express disgust. Take a moment and realize where they are what they are doing and be happy that no matter what side they are on, they are never completely certain on how to handle life and am hoping that someone in the similar spot they are can give them that virtual "like" that like a short, brief hug, shows that everything is ok, you're doing great, keep going you'll figure it out. Be happy in the fact that we are all unsure of life together but are planning on figuring it out together and that is not a bad thing.
Unless its one of those "lost my phone, need numbers" posts because let's be honest, those annoy everyone.