As a recovering people pleaser, I spent many years passing out invitations to anyone directly involved in my life, and sometimes to those who I had never met, to join me in the decision making process. Every major choice had no less than five opinions accompanying my own personal desires, which of course were put on the back burner if they didn’t align with what others wanted me to do.
The fear of disappointing the people I trusted was more debilitating than the pain of betraying myself. I tricked myself into believing other people knew what was best for me. I was living a life that I couldn’t recognize.
A few years ago, after struggling to balance everyone’s desired path for me, I realized I was hurting myself and destroying every ounce of individuality I had left. I had been given the most beautiful life as a gift, but I let everyone else unwrap it and assemble it the way they deemed fit. I knew how I wanted my life to unfold. I knew my passions, strengths, and desires, but it just took some time to stop giving people the power to determine my path.
I often look back at that time in my life and question why I did that. Why would I give people the control to steer my course? For me, I believe that deep down I was scared. I was scared of failing, of disappointing, of being too great. I had this incredible life painted in my mind, a life where I spent my moments making the world a better place for others; however, I was terrified if I chose to go after this that people wouldn’t see me as a person worthy of listening to. No one would read my words, watch my videos, or believe in what I was trying to do. With that, I gave up control for what I perceived was the comfort of living a safe life.
What I have learned in my time writing and reading is that I’m never alone, and I am sure that I there are many who are currently shaking their heads in agreement. I urge you to join me. Stop letting other people choose what your life will look like. While it’s great to heed advice from others who have experienced what you’ve been through, you get to decide. You need to be the one behind the mistakes, triumphs, decisions, and beliefs. Betraying your heart has to be more feared than the presumed disappointment of someone you love. It’s not their life; they don’t have to answer for your decisions. You do, so pick the path that you feel is best. You know who you are better than anyone else.
Even more than this, you get to choose how great your life is. You have every opportunity to ferociously chase your dreams, or you can decide you’re not worthy of them. It honestly lies squarely on your shoulders. Take the power and thrive. The world needs you.
Go be great, EP